Will B. Thinking of Mom
After writing about my dad last week, it’s only fair to write about Mom.
My mom passed away about 20 years ago. My relationship with her was the polar opposite of the relationship I had with my dad. I don’t know if “passed away” is the right word because my mom was murdered by her ex-boyfriend while living in Florida. Realizing he was abusive, she ended the romance but decided to put closure to the relationship by meeting with him one last time to talk about things.
After the conversation turned heated, my mom left the bar and drove away. Unbeknownst to her, her drunk ex-boyfriend borrowed his friend’s truck and raced after her. He quickly caught up to her and began ramming her vehicle, causing her blazer to fishtail then roll while ejecting her into oncoming traffic. She landed headfirst into the windshield of the car and died. The ex-boyfriend only received 25 years for the crime.
I have always been very close to my mom. Although she appeared sporadically throughout my life, she was the only person who truly understood me—until I met my wife, Amanda.
I lived with mom until I was 6 years old, and then I was sent to live with my dad, along with my two brothers. When I was 12 years old, dad dumped my younger brother and I at her doorstep in Florida with no explanation. Later, I found out dad returned us to mom because of his divorce from my stepmom. We stayed with mom for roughly a year until she was unable to afford us. Because dad didn’t want to take us back, she put us in a children’s home for a year or so.
A year later, Mom and Dad agreed that mom would take care of my younger brother while I would go live with Dad and my older brother. I wish it had been reversed because if you look at the history of my older brother and me and the history of my younger brother who went to live with my mom, you would see what a difference a caring parent can have on a child’s life. Again, another story for another time.
I can’t put my finger on why I was so close to my mom. All I know is that I had a close bond with her. I had plenty of long talks with her that I always enjoyed, and we use to go to museums together along with other activities that most of the people in my circle were not interested in exploring.
After meeting my wife of more than 20 years, it was important to me that she meet my mom and that they had a chance to get to know each other. They had the chance to talk a few times on the phone. Mom lived in Florida at the time. Amanda and I made plans to marry later that summer and go to Florida for our honeymoon for two weeks so she could get to know my mom. But it was not to be. Later that summer is when my Moms ex-boyfriend killed her. I am very grateful my wife at least had the chance to chat with Mom a few times over the phone. I would not have made it that summer without Amanda there to support me in my time of need.
Thinking about it now, I believe I wanted to share this story as well because of all the deaths going on right now. Don’t wait until it’s too late to make memories with those you love or to tell them what they mean to you.
This is Will B. saying tomorrow is not guaranteed.