Will B.

I have always had a very small circle of friends; one might say microscopic! I have very stringent requirements to be considered a friend. It’s basically two rules, a friend must be loyal and a friend must invest as much time into the friendship as I do.

Seems easy enough, but these two requests have kept me from fostering many a friendship. Am I too strict? Who knows, each of us must decide what guidelines and what is acceptable in a relationship.

I had a hard upbringing through my teenage years and ran with even a rougher crowd at the time. My code was lax and I had many so-called friends, because I was less strict on what someone had to do to be friends or in my circle. Today every friend I had growing up is either dead or I have lost contact with, with the exception of two friends. One friend I have had since elementary and one since junior high. One is stable, with a family and I could always count on know how to find him. The other is an outlaw, I mean that in every sense of the word. Both I consider best friends because they always have followed my code. Loyal and investing the same amount of time I do.

Friend two comes and goes in my life very sporadically and lives a pretty wild life, but I know if I called on him, he would drop everything and be there to help in whatever I asked. Friend one I believe would do the same, although I have never tested it.

Every man lives by a code, whether you know it or not, and everyone most likely has a friendship code when choosing who to be friends with. What is yours?

The problem I have run into is that this code has kept me from having many friends and now I find myself alone with no friends close by. Do I relax my code? Are work friends and acquaintances enough these days? Is just having many acquaintances the new norm in this day of Facebook? If I count online friends, then I have many. Is this the same as real life friends? I would like to think so to some extent. I am sure many will disagree. I have been married 22 years and always considered my wife my best friend and have been content with letting that friendship be my main source for friendship. With that coming to an end, it has me scrambling to search for a friend. Someone to have a beer with and shoot the bull with or go fishing with. Sometimes life teaches lessons too late in life and this is the lesson I must get through now. How does one make friends nowadays in this age of Facebook and in a town where everyone already has lifelong friends they grew up with? This is Will B saying, ?