In the Grip of Fear, In the Hand of God
In this moment, the world is spinning along its usual path in a universe so gigantic that we can’t even really conceive of its magnificence. Earth is just one small dot on a grid of millions of heavenly bodies of different kinds. Yet, here we are, special creation, made in the image of God, bent under the weight of incredible sin, grieving over wars that are raging as I write, powerless to control what cannot be controlled. Worried. Terrified. Wondering how it all turns out okay in the end.
And where is God? We wonder what He is doing. We question whether He is good. The bad news just keeps coming. And it seems like there’s a hole in our faith bucket. We read the stories that seem to point to the end of the world as we know it, and we tremble inside. We wish that we could see what God’s ultimate plan is. We wish that we could understand what is really happening when it looks like everything is chaos and craziness. But, we don’t have to know every aspect of God’s plans or His will or His interesting way of accomplishing things. We don’t even have to like what we see Him doing. We don’t have to approve of His methods or be happy about every twist and turn that He has built into our road ahead.
But, even when we are heartbroken, when we are discouraged to the point of despair, when we are crippled by the fear of what is to come, when we are angry at God, when we feel abandoned, when we feel anxiety coming over us in waves, when we don’t even know who we are anymore, the Truth is still true.
Our feelings about the Truth don’t change it. They don’t weaken its power. They don’t deny us access to it. The Truth is always completely real, even when we are feeling around in the pitch black of our own fear just trying to lay hold of one tiny corner of it. It is there.
The Truth is that everything is going to be okay. If we are in Christ and He is in us, if God has us held tight in His hand, nothing can snatch us out of it, not even our fear. So, in the light of Truth we can imagine our worst fears, things we are too afraid to even give words to, images and terrors that reside in our minds that seek us out as we lie in bed at night. Fears borne in irrational thinking or fears based on what we have already experienced–it doesn’t matter. We can imagine that our very worst fear comes true, and we can face it because we have the hope of Jesus Christ.
A friend revealed that she had a crippling fear that someone would break into her house and murder her family. The Truth came back to her in the echoes of Scripture she had memorized as a child: “The Lord is good and His word endures forever. . .Trust in the Lord with all your heart and don’t lean on your own understanding. . .Fear not, for I am with you. . .I sought the Lord and He answered me and delivered me from my fears. . .If we are faithless, He remains faithful.” She agonized over this fear for quite some time before she finally embraced the Truth that even if her very worst fear came true, everything would still be okay.
God is in the business of making things right. He is good and trustworthy, and His Truth remains, even when we are having a hard time remembering it.
Maybe you have already faced your worst fears. Maybe you are angry with God. Maybe you are so heartsick that you don’t believe you will ever recover. And maybe you won’t, in this life. But, God is working. Please believe it. His Truth stands, despite our circumstances. We can trust Him. And, at the end of it all, which is really only the beginning, everything really will be okay, if we know Him. Rest in His hand, my sweet, tired friends. He is good.